Why Am I So Angry?
Many of you have known me for a lot of years. For some strange reason you have remained friends and family even though you've seen the worst of me numerous times. I can only assume that you either have, a need to be punished, a shortfall of angry people in your life, or you want to be around when you see me burst into flames.
Over the years I have had you ask me why am I so angry, or why are you so negative? I haven't really been able to answer you because there were just so many things that had me upset, it didn't make sense to even get started. I was afraid you would think I was crazier than you already thought.
Because life is getting shorter, I wanted to give you some examples of what makes me so frustrated that I just have to go off like a roman candle sometimes. These are some of the things that are in my head 24/7 that I can't fix, and some are things that just drive me mad when I see it. Hopefully I won't lose too many of you after this.
Politics and politicians get me stirred up like few other things in life. I have been frustrated for years at the two party system in our country because neither party fits 100% of my wants. The Democrats are on the same page as me when it comes to social issues, but they spend money like drunken sailors on shore leave. In the past, the Republicans were so far away from my social positions it was scary, but they were all about fiscal responsibility and not wasting tax dollars.
Today, the Democrats still are aligned with my social positions, and while they talk about reducing the debt, they still manage to come up with more ways to spend money. Then they raise taxes to cover the costs. The GOP has honestly lost its mind. They are not the Republican party I grew up on, and they seem to be on a mission to kill the party completely. They have become a party of lies, rumors, fealty to one man, and only care about two groups, the wealthy 1% and the Trump followers.
My frustration comes from not having anyone to vote for that fits all my needs and wants. I end up having to chose between one bad option or another. As soon as I vote I know I made a mistake and will have to live with it for two to six years. Then, when in office, they prove me right by being completely tone deaf, or worse, completely off their rockers.
Speaking of politicians, another thing that gets my blood pressure up is lying. I'm not talking about little white lies, or exaggerations, I'm talking about flat out lying when even you know you're lying. Things like, "I actually won the election in a landslide but the Democrats stole it from me", or, "I did not have sexual relations with that girl", or, "Sorry, but we've decided to go with someone who has more experience than you for this position." The fact that they are one third my age, and will work for one third the pay, had nothing to do with it. Really.
Lying hit the after burners these past four years, but it has been creeping into our daily lives with greater frequency over the past decade and a half. Politicians aren't the only ones guilty either. Lying has become so accepted that people now lie even when they don't have to, just because it is easier than telling the truth. It is one of those things that really gets to me and I'm not going to apologize.
Injustice and oppression are things I obviously never had to consider growing up. Well, other than what I felt my mother was doing to me and that is not even close to the same thing. As I've gotten older, I'm finding that my disgust with those that continue to work hard to keep people down, gets stronger and stronger with each case that pops up.
These past few years, the rapid increase of black men being shot by police, women being assaulted, and children being abused has reached staggering records. It seems like just when you focus your attention over here, something horrible happens over there. Many days I feel like the little boy trying to plug the leaks in the dam with no success.
I just don't understand why so many people don't want to see someone succeed just because they are black, or gay, or female. How is their success going to hurt you in your daily life? Additionally, why does what they do in their personal life mean a single thing to you? Will your life change one bit if two men get married or a couple decides to have an abortion? What would you think if they marched out front of your house because you dared to use a coffee maker? It is the same thing. Their business is none of your business.
It's time all of us started to stand up and say enough is enough already. Stay out of my business and don't force your values onto me. Believe me, I really could not care less how you feel about something. That is your business not mine. Same goes back to me. Don't tell me what I should be doing or feeling.
I find it discouraging that the biggest output of fake news, comes from the very people shouting the loudest about fake news, and so many people actually believe them. I cannot make this clearer for you. If you see and hear someone say something that is either obviously wrong, or later proved to be wrong, then it is not fake news when the media points it out. It doesn't matter how many times someone says they didn't say it, if there is video tape of them saying it, then they did. Period.
The main stream media is not the enemy, or the liars, or the distributor of fake news. They are simply reporting what happens. That is not fake. If anyone says that what the media is reporting is fake, then you can bet they are most likely lying themselves, and you should not believe them. Oh, and Twitter and Facebook, are not a real source of news.
Here is another way to be sure what you are reading or seeing is true. If every newspaper and television station is reporting a story one way, and another organization is the only one reporting a different version, then that single reporting is not true. Pretty simple right? Yet almost 35% of the country thinks that the one news organization reporting a different version is the one that is telling the truth. Please find your common sense and use it.
So, that is the tip of the iceberg of what makes me mad. I didn't even get into the ugly blue uniforms the Cubs insist on wearing, or the inability of the states to come up with a simple vaccination plan, or why so many states are removing restrictions to wearing a mask in public. I could go on for hours and still not cover all the things going on in my head each and every day that make me angry or frustrated.
I know much of the issue is that I am a confirmed Aries. This creates an immediate problem in my head because I feel that I am the only one that can do something right, or that I am the only one that can see the big picture from 60,000 feet. I have always had this issue and I've accepted that it isn't going to go away. I have learned to ignore most of the little shit and focus only on the big stuff, but I won't lie, some days it doesn't work.
I'm not sorry for how I feel about these things. I am sorry for making you uncomfortable sometimes, or having to defend me to someone because you and I are friends or family. I know it would be better if I could become the Czar of the world for ten days, or so, and fix the really bad stuff, but if that did happen I would never relinquish my title, which would lead to other issues.
Thank you for letting me share, and I hope you will still talk to me occasionally.